The Date Where She Paid—and I Learned
Receiving as a masculine practice
January 2025 |
4 min read |
Oren Knaan |
Relationships
The date was surprisingly warm. The bill arrived. She took out her card. I said to the waitress, "We'll pay separately." She replied: "I'll pay."
A flash of fear: did I mess up by not insisting? Wanting a second date, I jumped in—"Never mind, I'll pay"—but she insisted. I mumbled, "Okay, I'll pay next time."
Later, I asked innocently: "Why did you pay?" She said: "Because I wanted to. It's just money, and the conversation felt like therapy. You shared personally. I enjoyed and learned, and I felt like paying for you."
What I Learned
- Receiving is part of healthy masculinity.
- Generosity can be a response to presence, not performance.
- Curiosity dissolves fear faster than control.
On that date, I told her I help people connect to their hearts. I didn't imagine she'd be the one to help me connect to mine. Feeling humbled 🥲.